Brandon Notices

April Fool's Day is tomorrow. I like April Fool's Day! Some people apostrophize (I checked; that's really a word!) "April Fools Day" differently. I guess it depends on who you interpret is the fool. Myself, I put the apostrophe after fool because I see it as a holiday when you "fool" people... day to fool, fool's day. Isn't "fool" a weird word? "FOOOOOOL." Say it. Encarta defines FOOL as several things, including a person who behaves comically or entertains...that's how I see the word "fool" in "April Fool's Day".

Probably one weakness I have when fooling people is that I never get around to saying "April Fool!" I mean, the opportunity never arises. For example, and here's a weak example, I say, "Whoops, I forgot my lunch!" knowing well that I have not forgotten my lunch. Then somebody will say "Oh, that's too bad" or something. Then what? That's not an appropriate time to say "April Fool!" I don't know, maybe it's a bad example or something, but saying "April Fool!" right then would be awkward and would feel out of place. Hey, isn't "awkward" also a weird word? Think about it. Think about how weird all words are.

Oh, don't think about poking me on the right shoulder from behind when you're standing on my left. I never fall for that one. Besides, I probably won't be turning my back on anyone tomorrow anyway (I wouldn't want a "Kick me!" sign taped (or worse, glued!) on the back of my shirt).

I wonder if anybody has an April Fool's Day prank planned where they bring a gun to school. I hope nobody's planning a joke like that, because it probably won't end up being very funny.

There are several types of April Fool's Day pranks. I'll list a few:

1. Spoken Pranks
   These usually take the least amount of preparation, and when done correctly, can usually make people laugh or make other people laugh at the prankee. Here are a few examples of Spoken Pranks:
   • "My dog Freddy died."
   • "I told the teacher you were cheating, even though you probably weren't."
   • "I'm the one who pulled the fire alarm."
   • "I need to raise $50 to bail my dads out of jail."
   • "I liked my trip to Renton."



2. Gestural Pranks
   These are really simple, subtle pranks that only involve movement of a body part or gazing in one direction. Here are a few examples of Gestural Pranks:
   • If you're talking to somebody whose back is to a door, look around him as if somebody is entering the room. He'll turn around to see who's entering.
   • Say "You've got something on your face," and touch somewhere on your own face. The prankee will frantically try to rub something off his face.
   • Look up, and people will look up to see what you're looking at.
   • Stand behind somebody to the right, and tap his left shoulder. He will look over his left shoulder, and will be surprised to see that nobody's standing there!



3. Physical Pranks
   These are much more involved than Gestural Pranks, and usually get more attention as well. It's likely that you will get the attention of a lot of people, so if you try to pull one of these off, make sure it is a good one. If the prank doesn't work, you'll feel embarassed. Here are a few examples of Physical Pranks:
   • Pretend like you're about to trip right into somebody.
   • Stick your foot out right in front of somebody walking, and trip him. Works great if he's carrying a bunch of books!



4. Prop Pranks
   These pranks require some preparation because the props have to be gathered or constructed ahead of time. Here are a few examples of Prop Pranks:
   • He bites into the donut and is surprised that instead of jelly filling, it has mustard filling!
   • Poke holes in the side of somebody's straw while they're away. When they try to drink with the straw, it'll be difficult to suck the beverage up!
   • Give somebody a mylar balloon that says "It's A Girl!" in front of a bunch of people.
   • Slip a few sardines into somebody's sandwich.
   • Tape a "Kick Me" sign on somebody's back.
   • Tape a "Kill Me" sign on an enemy's back.

In elementary school, my teachers seemed to love April Fool's Day. They'd play a prank on us. I remember falling for a trick Mrs. Engle played on us once in 2nd grade when she told us that school lasted an hour later, and we were going to get rid of third recess. I was like, Nooooooooo! Actually, though, they did get rid of third recess a few years later.

Elementary school teachers like pranking little kids, but in high school, none of the teachers seem to like playing tricks. Hmmm... but this year, I have a bunch of good teachers. Ms. Hudemann, Mr. Worster, and Ms. Shaw are three likely teachers to try to prank us. Mr. Singh and Ms. Dixon are probably too serious, and it would be too confusing for Ms. Brinkley to try to fool us, so...I don't know.

Ahhh... tomorrow, I have to go to school early tomorrow during Tutorial to catch up in my classes. Maybe, instead of telling my teachers I was sick, I could tell them something more serious, like maybe I fell down the stairs or I had symptoms of a heart attack or something. I bet a few of my teachers are going to try to fool me into thinking I missed something serious or something difficult to make up. Then I'd probably ask them, "Are you foolin' me?" and they'd say no, even though they probably were or something. It's hard to tell.

Pay close attention to this. If you try to fool somebody, and they ask you if you're trying to fool them, just say you are. It's annoying if you say, "No, I'm not fooling you," but later, you say you were fooling. I mean, the person already probably figured out you were fooling them but you said you weren't.... yadda yadda....... I call it a "fool loop". It's too confusing to talk about it in detail. I'm only making my headache worse.

I don't know how much my friends like April Fool's Day. I don't remember from last year what they did, or how they reacted to my foolings. I guess we'll see (unless I'm sick, but I can't miss school on April Fool's Day!)

Oh, if you skipped all of the above paragraphs to read this conclusion, shame on you! Go back and reread it all.