Brandon Notices

Yesterday, Kevin, Katrina, Christina, and I went to Shelly's "mansion" to move her furniture from her room to the basement, where her new room is. It was fun. I put up Christmas lights all around the room! Then Shelly took us to Baskin-Robbins. Then we got Little Caesar's pizza. The pepperoni pizza doesn't have enough cheese on it.

Today, we are going hiking somewhere near Larrabee. Mom and Stephanie are supposed to meet us there. I'm not entirely sure where it is or how long the hike is, but I do know this: I'm bringing a peanut butter and jelly sandwich.

Let's see... I've been “camping” since Sunday. Really, we’re in my aunt’s backyard.

On Sunday, not too much happened. First, Kevin, Stephanie, Ryan, Daniel, Dad, and I had a water gun fight. My shield was useful, but unfortunately, I frequently run out of water. Then, we went into Kevin's old playhouse, and looked at some toys and stuff, some of which is older than me. We also played tetherball and air hockey. We used Daniel's projector to play Atari and Nintendo on the pole building. It's fun playing Super Mario Bros. 3 twenty feet high.

Monday morning, Daniel, Kevin, and I hooked up Game Boy Advances and played Mario Bros. Later that afternoon, Mom, Dad, Stephanie, Daniel, Dick, Kevin, and I went to Larrabee to hike down to the beach, but we took another trail instead once we realized that we passed the parking lot. It was a nice trail. It even crossed over the railroad. The beach wasn't much...more like rocks along the shore. Sandstone.

Wise Old Man told us there was another trail to a nice, sandy beach if we followed the train tracks for half of a mile. While we were travelling along that track, a train came from ahead of us. Dick, Dad, and Kevin were ahead of us, saw it first, and yelled back for the rest of us to jump away from the track. Daniel and I did. However, Mom and Stephanie were far behind, and almost didn't hear us. They jumped off the track with maybe ten seconds to spare. (Mom was beginning to regret going with us, wishing she had gone with Karen and Carla to Costco instead.) After all that, there was a nice beach. Shelly joined us then. We saw lizards! Shelly and I searched for geckos so that I could record them with my camcorder. Dad dropped his cell phone into the Puget Sound. That night, we watched a movie with Daniel's projector.

Yesterday, on Tuesday, even more stuff happened. Oh wait...I mean less stuff happened. Dad, Mom, Stephanie, and Karen went to the mall to buy Dad a new cell phone. Mom also got an identical one. While they did that, Kevin and I didn't really have much to do, so we watched some movies.

So that was fun. Then Mom asked me to program her phone. So I did. It's cool...it has a picture. I took a picture of Dad, and set it so that his picture appears on the phone when he calls. Funny! Mom downloaded an Aerosmith Dream On ringer. Whee, what fun. That night, many of us watched another movie on the projector.

Well, tomorrow, I'm going camping. I'm going prepared, too:



The SHIELD BLASTER 3000! I can use up to three nozzles for triple the dousingness! However, I get more power using only one. I can control how fast the water comes out by how quickly I turn a crank! However, if I crank too quickly (to get more power), I sacrifice control, and the water wobbles all over. The best thing of all, however, is that the water gun doubles as a shield, protecting me against enemy fire (I mean water). My arm just barely fits into the shield (my arm's just too muscular!) so it hurts a little. I probably couldn't use this for hours on end. It holds 60 ounces of water, which is double what my sister's and dad's can hold.



Stephanie and Dad have HYDROBLADEs. Ha ha, it only has one nozzle. The "cool" thing about it is that with a push of a button (on the other side of the picture), a circular foam "blade" swivels in front of the nozzle. It doesn't look like the blade in the picture—it's completely circular—no notches at all. What the blade is supposed to do is cause water to spray out in all directions. What it really does is cause water to backfire on the user. Funny. My shield is extremely useful against this blaster.

Kevin, Stephanie, and I went to see Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy. We went to the Regal Cinemas—the one next to Mervyns. All the movies seemed to be starting around the same time, so the tickets counter had a long line. We got our tickets, and entered the lobby. Nobody really felt like wanting to have refreshments. After a short wait, we went into the theater.

After sitting for a few minutes, The Twenty came on. For those of you who don't know what The Twenty is, it's some short little thing to entertain the audience before the showtime. Yes, it's about twenty minutes long. Kevin and I were annoyed and disappointed to find out that The Twenty promised several entertaining things, but never showed them. Born Supremicy and Evil Knieval in fact, but all we got to hear about was another one of Tim Allen's Christmas movies...

Then the movie started. It was good. I liked it.

Then we left. Remember how I said that all the movies seemed to be starting around the same time? Well, many ended at the same time, too. So it was difficult to get out of the parking lot because there were a lot of people trying to leave at the same time. So we got home, and that's pretty much where we're at now.

Well, next week, it's annual camping time. I don't know exactly what to expect, but I can promise you this:
I am going camping next week.

Karen left this morning. We never left to see Anchorman this week. However, Stephanie, Karen, and I played a lot of Life. You know, The Game of Life? We found a new pink car at the local Value Village, on Wednesday, that goes with the game. Stephanie and I were happy because our Life game doesn't have a pink car. Now Stephanie I think will always use the pink car. It's funny because both Mom and Karen want the red car. Kevin never cares what color he uses, so he usually gets whatever's left over.

Yesterday, Kevin came over, and he, Mom, Dad, Stephanie, Karen, and I went to the Tasters Wok (I don't like Asian food, so I wasn't happy), but there were too many cars in the parking lot, so we sat, in two cars in the parking lot, trying to decide where to go next. We decided on Ivars. Yum. I got fish and chips, and for dessert, I got some kind of chocolate pie. It was pretty good.

Then, Stephanie wanted to go ice skating with her friends. Stephanie and Kevin convinced me to go with them, so I got in the Jeep with them. However, we had to stop home anyway, and Karen decided to go with us. But she didn't want to skate. Neither did Mom. I can't blame them—I didn't skate either. Karen and I played dots. When Aunt Carla and her daughter Shelly arrived, Karen, Carla, and I played Upwords. I did quite well, getting more points than Karen, but fewer than Carla. But they're both pretty good, so I wasn't expecting to win or anything.

A show I've started watching that is pretty funny is on CBC, the Canadian channel. It comes on at 5:30, and is called Just For Laughs: Gags. It's a hidden camera show, but it's much better for several reasons. I like that there's no talking to distract from the show. For example, on Candid Camera, the host is always talking, and it takes away from the funniness. The gags on this show are more visually oriented, and they run much quicker. They manage to fit about 12 of these gags into a half-hour show, which is much better than Candid Camera's six in one hour.

Today, I got oriented for volunteering at the Puget Sound Blood Center (from now on, I'll be referring to it as the PSBC, or PBSC if I don’t think about it). It doesn't sound too hard, but it requires a lot of attention (if someone is feeling woozy, I need to do something about it).

Our digital cable box was updated some time last week, but the special new On Demand feature isn't working. Some Comcast employee should come on Saturday, I think, to fix it. I don't know how exciting this On Demand thing is, but Kevin's been hyping me up for several months about it now.

Lots of birds have been flying by recently, stopping at our bird feeder. The birds have been driving Garth nuts. He'll meow, wanting to chew a wing or something.

Dad just brought home a pack of Bertie Botts' Every Flavor Beans from Bartell Drugs. Here's the flavors: Black Pepper, Blueberry, Booger, Earthworm, Cherry, Cinnamon, Dirt, Ear Wax, Grape Jelly, Grass, Green Apple, Lemon Drop, Toasted Marshmallow, Buttered Popcorn, Sardine, Soup, Spaghetti, Spinach, Tutti-Frutti, and Vomit. The Dirt genuinely tastes like dirt! My favorite flavor is Soap. And you'll regret eating Earthworm. Eeyuck. Bleh! I though I was going to chase the retched flavor with a Soap jelly bean (how appropriate, eating soap after earthworm), but I was surprised to learn that it wasn't Soap. It was Sardine! Also bad tasting! Arrgh. Earthworm was worst, though.

My cousins, sister, and I have written a script for a movie based on the board game Clue that we're going to make during the last week of July. We wrote this before we knew that they already made a movie based on Clue. I'm bored right now, so I guess I'll post the entire script right here right now.

(Open with Mrs. White writing letters to the other characters in the study, each of the characters read a section aloud for the audience)

Dear Friends,

Mr. Boddy invites you to spend this weekend vacationing at his estate, Boddy Mansion. There will be dinner served in the dining room from our wonderful kitchen, ballroom dancing, and drinks in the lounge, lovely plants and flowers to smell in the conservatory, and good books to read from the library. Not to mention the great hallway leading into the study. There is lots of fun to be had in the billiards room. Oh, don’t forget to bring a personal weapon! You never know if you'll need it!

Sincerely, Mr. Boddy

(Mr. Boddy walks into the room)

BODDY: Have you written the letter?

(White nods once and says ‘mmhmmm’)

________________________________________

(Crossfade to Boddy Mansion exterior. Display title. Each arrives at the Boddy Mansion and is greeted by Mrs. White and Mr. Boddy and Mr. Boddy shakes each guest’s hand)

BODDY: Hello Miss Scarlet. Nice to see you. It’s been a while.

SCARLET: Yes it has!

BODDY: And Professor Plum, how goes the plumbing business?

PLUM: Oh, I’m up to my knees in work.

BODDY: Mr. Green, how is your gardening job doing?

GREEN: It’s the best it’s ever been.

BODDY: Col. Mustard, I haven’t seen you in a long time!

MUSTARD: Yes, (under breath) but not long enough.

BODDY: And Mrs. Peacock, hello!

PEACOCK: Hello. (She waves)

________________________________________

(White takes everyone on a tour of the mansion. She walks slowly, so everybody talks while they wait to get into the next room.)
WHITE: …and this is the lounge…

PEACOCK: Well, this is boring. I already know this mansion like the back of my hand. I used to work here as a chef.

SCARLET: Really? I used to work here as Mr. Boddy’s cosmetologist. I would make him look good before he taped commercials. He fired me when he got replaced by a younger spokesperson.

PEACOCK: Commercials? For what?

SCARLET: I don’t know.

PEACOCK: Boddy fired me when I served him escargot and told him it was snails.

SCARLET: Eww… snails.

GREEN: Did I hear you right? You two used to work here too? I used to be Mr. Boddy’s gardener! But I quit because he wouldn’t give me money to purchase new seeds and tools.

PEACOCK: I wonder if everyone here has worked for Boddy.

WHITE: (irritated) Shush… follow along quietly now.

(Scarlet shrugs)

________________________________________

(Everybody but Boddy is sitting at the table for dinner.)

PLUM: Mrs. White, where is Mr. Boddy?

WHITE: He’s finishing drawing in his Flintstones coloring book. I’ll go get him.

(She exits)

MUSTARD: This food needs more mustard.

PEACOCK: Oooh, mustard. That sounds good. Could you pass the mustard, Mustard?

MUSTARD: (passing the mustard) I invented mustard.

SCARLET: (impressed) Ooooooooooooooooh!

WHITE: Okay, Mr. Boddy is on his way in here. He just has to put away his crayons.

________________________________________

(Afterwards, Mustard, Plum, Green, Peacock, and White sit in the lounge, waiting to play a board game. Scarlet walks in.)

SCARLET:Blech…Mr. Boddy is absolutely hideous!

WHITE: Meh. He takes me for granted…he never says “thank you. ”You know, this mansion has always been in my family. Boddy is just a squatter, who happens to own this mansion. I hate him. He stole my mansion!

MUSTARD: So what, he stole your mansion. He stole my trillion-dollar idea! I hate his guts. He stole my idea for mustard and marketed it, making millions of millions of dollars!

PLUM: He hated my idea of plum mustard. I mean doesn’t that sound good, plum mustard? I think it does. I quit when he threw the plum mustard into my face. I swear, I hate that man.

GREEN: He doesn’t know how to treat people! First of all, he wouldn’t give me any money to buy flower seeds or tools to make gardens. Then he complains when there aren’t any flowers in the garden! So I quit.

PEACOCK: Oh, shut up everybody. I am hateful towards him because I hate everybody. Except my cats. (She pets Ralph, if he’ll stay in her lap)

PLUM: That’s not your cat—

BODDY (walking into the room) LET GO OF KITTY.

________________________________________

(Nighttime. From now on, all of the characters but the investigator wear their pajamas/robes. Scarlet stands in front of Peacock’s door and knocks. After a few seconds, Peacock answers the door, looking annoyed.)

PEACOCK: Yes? ?

SCARLET: Did you hear a noise?
PEACOCK: No, (angrily) I was sleeping.

SCARLET: Oh. Sorry to disturb you. (She turns to walk away.)

PEACOCK: Wait.

(Scarlet turns back.)

SCARLET: Yes?
PEACOCK: Could you give me a makeover?

(Scarlet smiles.)

________________________________________

(Morning. Outside shot of the Boddy Mansion. There is a loud girl-like scream, which comes from Prof. Plum, who stands in the kitchen, staring at Mr. Boddy, who lies dead on the floor. Everyone rushes into the kitchen. Scarlet kneels down next to body, and checks for a pulse, or breathing.)

SCARLET: He’s dead.

(She runs to the telephone and picks it up, dialing 911.)

PEACOCK: I bet Mrs. White did it.

WHITE: I didn’t do it!

PEACOCK: Oh, come on. The butler always does it.

WHITE: I’m not a butler!

GREEN: I didn’t do it either!

(The investigator runs into the scene.)

INVESTIGATOR:I am the private investigator! I will ask everybody in turn about his or her whereabouts last night. Sooooooo… I’ll ask Col. Mustard first!!!!

MUSTARD: (off-guard) You can’t ask the murderer first!

(Everyone laughs except for Mustard.)

MUSTARD: (nervous) Just kidding.

INVESTIGATOR: (turning to Scarlet) Did you do it?

SCARLET: No, I was giving a makeover to Mrs. Peacock all night, I couldn’t possibly have done it.

INVESTIGATOR: You were giving it all night?
SCARLET: She really needed it.

MUSTARD: I didn’t do it!

INVESTIGATOR: What about you plummy?

PLUM: I was too drunk to be able to handle a weapon.

MUSTARD: I was making a sandwich!

INVESTIGATOR: (jokingly) You didn’t happen to use any mustard when making that sandwich, did you?
(Mustard frantically runs from the room into the lounge; everyone gasps.)
(White raises her finger.)

WHITE: Mr. Boddy is deathly allergic to mustard, and I’m the only one who has ever known this, except for Mr. Boddy, and, possibly, Col. Mustard.

PRIVATE INVESTIGATOR: Hmm… there is mustard all over Mr. Boddy’s lips…. . someone must have fed him mustard…poisoning him to his death.

(Everyone else walks into the lounge, watching Mustard twiddle his thumbs.)

MUSTARD: I really did kill Mr. Boddy. Not kidding.

WHITE: How come?

________________________________________

(Flashback! Everything in the flashback is muted. We could even mute the colors. Mustard, Boddy, and several other extras are at a barbeque on Boddy’s back porch. Mustard is spreading some mustard from an unmarked container onto his food.)

MUSTARD VO: Years ago, at a barbeque party Boddy was holding, I put some mustard on a (hot dog/burger). One of his guests asked if she could try some. Of course, I said yes.

(One of the guests spreads mustard on her food. She enjoys it.)

MUSTARD VO: Of course, Boddy wanted to try some too. He didn’t seem to like it too much.

(Boddy, after eating some of the mustard, collapses on the back porch. Everyone rushes around in panic.)

MUSTARD VO: We rushed Boddy to the hospital, and I forgot about the mustard I left on the back porch.

(Zoom in on container of mustard.)

MUSTARD VO: When Boddy returned, he must have realized how popular the mustard was, and marketed it. He got trillions of dollars! All from my idea!

________________________________________

(No more flashback.)

MUSTARD: He didn’t even give me a nickel. All I could do to get revenge was kill him.

INVESTIGATOR: Col. Mustard, you’re under arrest for first-degree murder.

(The investigator will not be on camera for the rest of the movie.)

MUSTARD: Nobody’s taking me to jail!

(He draws out the revolver, his choice weapon.)

(Everyone else, shocked, takes out his/her weapon, aiming at Mustard and everyone else. This lasts for a short while.)

MUSTARD: Time out! (He runs out of the lounge.)

(Everyone chases him. Mustard runs out of the front door, quickly followed by everyone else.)

(Cut to exterior shot of front porch. Everyone runs onto the front doorstep, and looks out, surprised, to see Mustard already driving away. Everyone gives cries of despair, anger, surprise.)

SCARLET: I’ll get you next time, Mustard!!! Next time!

GREEN: We could still catch him.

PEACOCK: I would if I could but I can’t so I won’t.

PLUM: Indubitably.

WHITE: Let’s go try to bring Mr. Boddy back to life!

(Everyone makes sounds of approval and walks back inside.)
The End.

Karen, Carla, and Shelly made it safely from Kansas. Kevin came over too. He, Shelly, Stephanie, and I wrote a script for a play that I will probably post on here once we finish editing it. It's based on the board game Clue. It's going to be bizarre.

We went to Chuck E. Cheese's today! (Well, actually, it wasn't today, as "today" ended less than an hour ago...) I took my camcorder with me! It was fun. Karen, Kevin, Stephanie, Mom, Shelly, and I went, and Katrina and Kristi met us there about half-hour later. It was fun. We played a lot of Skee-Ball. I'm a little tired, so I won't be posting as much about the trip as I did last time. Shelly and I both redeemed our tickets for pink fist-like plastic projectiles. When you squeeze the handle, the air pressure inside forces the pink puncher across the room! Mine is already beginning to not work.